Real You Leadership

Day 27/30: Oversharing Observations: We’re going to optimize every ounce of creativity, artistic expression, play, critical thinking, and whimsy out of us.

I can’t multi-task anymore.
I don’t have that great of a hustle muscle anymore.
I’m allergic to over-planning anything.

Candidly, if you look at the dates of all my posts for this Oversharing Observations for 30 days challenge, you’ll see that it’s been probably 45 days since I started — and I’m damn proud of it.

Because I do things at my natural pace and I honor the capacity I have.

I have learned to be more disciplined about my peace more than my work, so that when I’m “clocked in” I’m fully, deeply locked in with the people I serve.

The rest is part of my work.
The play is part of my work.
The art is part of my work.
The spaciousness of my day is part of my work.

I don’t want to speed up my creativity, writing, and critical thought with AI, productivity hacks, and optimization tools.

I want time to doodle, scribble, dabble, and make a damn mess in experiments.

I want time to bike to my favorite bakery, dance while watching coffee drip, and enjoying breakfast with the love of my life at our natural pace.

So I do what I can to practice the peace I want, as much as I can on the daily.

day 26/30: Oversharing observations - Love teaches you to be a better communicator, human, and ally.

I think there are a million times my love and I could’ve called it quits and I’m so glad we continue to do the work across cultural, identity, and language differences.

Love is about releasing control and grounding in connection to build bridges.

You have to constantly release your ego.
Release the desire to be “right.”
Release what was to accept the other person and you are constantly evolving.

You have to keep choosing to stay in relationship.
Keep cultivating passion, romance, and play.
Keep listening, supporting, and witnessing.
Keep dreaming beyond and rooting in the now.

You have to love each other through each other’s biggest hurt, fears, and obstacles.

Go after your combined dreams and allow each other to be your own person with your own ambitions, energies, and flow.

Who you choose to love in this life — friends, family, lovers, community — is so important.

How you choose to show up in the love is up to you.

It ain’t easy, but I’m so glad love it led me to this season of my life.

Day 22/30: Oversharing observations — I’m a bit stressed and anxious in the background making some big personal moves (good things, but stressful nonetheless), and I’m also straight up feeling so much grief over the news and global fascism.

I have a tendency to throw myself into work harder and/or be an antisocial hermit and stay at home when I’m in an overwhelmed state like I woke up with today.

Sometimes this response and behavior pattern feels healthy and just want I need—to be in my own energy, go inward, get s**t done, and be truly productive. It’s coming from a values-aligned place, a place of knowing my needs and limits.

Sometimes the same exact response and behavior are actually coming from a place of avoidance, activation, and defense patterns.

I believe that none of these actions and reactions are necessarily good or bad—but it’s been important to learn how discern which state I’m in and the quality of my mind, heart, and spirit.

Today I almost wanted to overwork in order to feel some sense of accomplishment and hopefully less anxious. I wanted to just rot on my couch and not go outside.

But my partner gave me a gentle invitation, “I’m going to go and take photos of the mercado calenda. You can come with me or stay at home—but I think you’re going to like it.”

I smiled and said, “honestly, dancing and hearing live music would probably be good for me right now.” (A little somatic experience and release never hurts)

It was just what I needed to remember that this moment matters. That I’m living a version of life I dreamed of, that felt so far away once. And gratitude bubbled up.

Each day is full of thousands of micro-choices, and we can start to see them mor and more with practice (and sometimes a little support.)

Day 18/30: Oversharing observations - I love being by myself and enjoying my own energy soooo damn much.

I love the version of me that has created the space and time to literally zen out and organized a bunch of beads that got mixed up over a year ago, singing along to a record at the top of my lungs, cuddling my needy cats as they ask for it.

It used to be hard for me to make time for myself—truly just for myself. In these demanding times, I didn’t know who i was for so long outside of my jobs, obligations, relationships, and the pressures of adult life.

I used to be scared or avoidant of too much free time by myself. Like I was missing out if I wasn’t out, doing the most, seeing as many people as possible — I used to never ever know myself, my inner voice, or what I’d do if I didn’t fill up my free time with multiple plans or overbooking.

I love the people in my life. I love being out in the world. I love being amongst the vibrations of others.

And I love that I love being with me. The rituals that have emerged, the self-trust that I’ve cultivated, and the delight in knowing who I am is a gift.

day 16/30: ya gotta be honest with yourself when your inner beliefs and fears are holding you back from having critical conversations that have the ability to completely change your life.

Yes, structural inequities are baked into every workplace, industry, and team.

Yes, we shouldn’t have to negotiate.

Yes, we shouldn’t have to speak for our work.

But until these systems are completely taken down and transformed—we have to practice self-advocacy in and out of our careers.

One thing I’ve noticed coaching leaders through these conversations is that the biggest challenge usually isn’t identifying that their role has changed. They already know it has.

The hardest part is believing they’re allowed to say:
“This isn’t the role I was hired to do anymore.”
“I can’t keep absorbing more.”
“My compensation no longer reflects the work I’m doing.”

Those are incredibly vulnerable things to say in such a volatile job market.

I hear it all the time: “If I push back, will I be next?” or “If I ask for more, will I make myself a target?”

Those fears are real. But staying quiet doesn’t guarantee safety.