Pinkies Nails

Stats- 87% felt better after matching about getting through their sentence , 77% felt better about their future , 83% felt better about being connected to the outside world once being befriended , 83 %felt better about themselves as a result of having a befriender . Just one letter shows them they are more then just a number .

So that’s it I’m done . 6 years with an access course complete . When I started I had no idea how far I would get , what I would get from this or who I would be . I wanted to do something purely for me , took time to allow that without feeling mum guilt .7 modules , 49 assignments /maths assessments , many many tutorials and a lot of hard work . Discovered I was Dyslexic along the way which made so much sense and really helped with my inner ‘ am I good enough ‘ battles. I have made some really lovely friends too who have been a great support with all the assignment struggles . I have had many days where it was so much to process , so much to understand, I have been fortunate to have lovely supportive tutor’s. The shoulders of friends and clients who have walked alongside me through every assignment . Mostly though are my boys , their support is what’s really counted along the way . Fraser putting up with endless IT issues , Louie helping me with my SPSS issues and positive words of encouragement and Elliot’s little notes he would leave lying around - you can do this mum , keep going you are nearly there . It’s immense and a feeling I’m not used to experiencing . I always thought I wasn’t good enough. We all measure that differently but for me , I can and I have . What’s next ? More volunteer work and see where that takes me , a whole new career . Anyone here still doing it , keep going , it’s stressful , overwhelming and exhausting but you can absolutely do it . One word at a time . That becomes a sentence , that becomes a paragraph that becomes an essay . Now to wait for results 😆

The reason I became a mum . The best job in the world . A wonderful and soul fulfilling one , there are challenges along the way all different . The love that instantly arrives when they are born is unequivocal. Nothing like it . My heart is full . We are an unbreakable team . I laugh , I smile , I feel happy when they are around with their own unique ways of doing that . I have learnt so much along the way that I didn’t think was possible and now young men making their own successful paths in the world . I know I’m a good mum but I keep learning with them alongside me . Proud 🥰🌎

I had a bit of a day yesterday that i wanted to address . I gained security clearance for my new volunteering role and passed my modules for . It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a while . I have learnt so much that will add to my skills and develop them further once I’m in the role . I also got TMA04 back with the best grade this year . That was a lot to process for me and was very overwhelming . I sat with it and allowed it . For the first time personally and academically I actually believe I can do this but also feel worthy of it too . I started my degree because I didn’t think I was clever or intelligent enough , there’s multiple layers to that which for me is huge . Getting this far has taken a lot of work and soul searching and self belief which is now becoming very real . I can do this , I am good enough .

Just keep being you . A new year doesn’t need to mean a new start or a change of you or a change in situations etc . It’s another day of being you .

Happy Christmas to you lovely people . Thank all my fabulous clients for your continued support and custom this year it is much appreciated . I hope you all have sometime with family and friends making special memories . It’s not about the food , drink , decorations or fuss. What you have done will be enough . You are enough , it will be enough . Be kind to yourself and enjoy your time together .

Just got my first TMA back for and I’m very surprised . I did not understand the 18 page article I had to read , particularly the results . It was very unsettling and gave me alot of anxiety and questioning my abilities on this module . I know it’s going to be challenging this year as it’s my final year and all working towards my dissertation , so I’d accepted the challenge . Also, each TMA builds towards it from now on . One step closer now but feels along way to go . But this has given me a bit of boost which I needed now to get stuck in TMA02. Continually learning about myself so much and that I am more capable than I think . Trusting the process and understanding what’s required moving forward will always be part of my structuring process .