Ruth Veda Therapy

Feeling the power of this message mixed in with fear. The suggestion this message makes to me is to be open to:

1) taking responsibility for my health
2) recognising its disempowering and limiting to 'blame' poor health on random acts of fate.

I am currently attending a 12-week Su***de Attention Training course with Compassionate Inquiry which is really helping me understand the nature of suicidal ideation.

I’m sharing some insights to help me digest what I am learning.

This quote has stayed with me:

“Diagnoses don’t explain anything, they just describe a process.” Dr. Gabor Maté.

Labels such as bipolar disorder, ADHD, borderline personality disorder, or depression can be useful maps. They help us recognise patterns and understand a process, but they cannot tell us the whole story of a person.

I am learning to approach suicidal distress not as a random malfunction, but with curiosity about the pain, context, and history around it. That means exploring the factors contributing to someone’s thoughts and listening deeply for the unmet needs beneath them.

In essence, a label or diagnosis is not the destination. It simply helps us ask better questions to understand the human being beneath it.

What does a diagnosis do for you? I would love to hear other perspectives...?

Find yourself saying "yes" when your body is screaming "no"?

Every time we say yes to keep the peace, we abandon ourselves to keep the connection. We tell ourselves "it’s fine" or "it’s not worth the fuss", meanwhile, resentment quietly builds inside.

Join Ruth & Pauline (trauma-informed Compassionate Inquiry Practitioners) for a supportive, experiential 90 minute workshop to help you reclaim your sovereign "No."

We will explore:

- People pleasing was once your body’s brilliant survival tool.
- How healthy anger gives you energy to hold a boundary.
- Creative mapping to feel where your limits actually live.

🗓 Tuesday, 11th November
⏰ 11:00 AM (90 mins)
📍 Online via Zoom
🎟 £20.00

Book here: https://tidycal.com/ruthvedatherapy/free-workshop-why-do-you-say-yes-when-you-mean-no

In my ideal world....

Last night I watched a powerful conversation between Dr Gabor Maté and Dr Shefali Tsabary.

It really made me think, because she said most parents just want their kids to be happy, yet this loving gesture can actually become a heavy burden to a child.

When happiness is what we as parents / step parents want for our children they hear "Your pain is not safe here." They learn to hide their sadness or struggle to protect us.

What if the goal isn’t raising happy kids, but raising whole human beings who know every emotion is welcome?

What do you think?

Watching my 17 year old nephew Louie bouldering brought this to mind. Even when he had to attempt routes over and over, I felt real warmth just staying present to his process and seeing his possibilities.

What if the goal isn’t chasing happiness, but being present to it all?

Permission to 'f**k' it up...

There’s a particular kind of freedom in being new at something.

You don’t know what you’re doing yet.

You’re awkward.

You make mistakes.

You watch someone else make it look ridiculously easy.

And none of that means you shouldn’t be there.

Somewhere along the way, many of us start choosing activities based on what we’re already good at.

But you’re allowed to try something without needing to become impressive at it.

Take the class.

Make the terrible painting.

Learn three chords.

Attempt the recipe.

Speak the language badly.

Wobble around the rink.

You might get better.

You might not.

You might simply have a really good time.

**Being a beginner isn’t a problem to solve.**

What would you try if you gave yourself permission to be bad at it?

Wednesday House Flow... bouncy, bouncy ...

Move & Groove

👣

www.youtube.com

This is why understanding my inner workings is so vital to me I aim to stay open & curious.....asking:

Why do I do the things I do?
Why do I think these thoughts, feel this fear, or experience this pain?

Allowing me to become more conscious and make choices that aren’t just driven by well worn neural pathways.

I am currently reading *Unlearn Your Pain by Dr. Howard Schubiner*
...and last week I attended a fantastic talk on the placebo effect and *the mind-body connection by Dr. David Hamilton*.

What new pathways do you want to create?